Ian Ziering, who will always be 90210’s Steve Sanders to us, recently revived his career with a stint on Dancing with the Stars. What’s he up to next? He has a deal with MySpace TV to adapt a short film he recently made into a show. The movie, Man Vs. Monday, casts Ziering as “a mid-level cubicle worker who commits some indiscretions over the weekend and faces karma in the form of a rough Monday morning where everything seems to go wrong.”
Wow, that sounds a lot like our lives…minus the indiscretions on weekends part. Sigh.
George Lucas has a pretty sweet life. He’s one of the most successful moviemakers ever, and can basically do whatever he wants. And he has more money than Croesus. However, it turns out that his personal assistant, Jane Bay, has a pretty damn sweet life too. Check it:
Several people at the ranch tell me that to understand Lucas and Skywalker Ranch the best person to talk to is Jane Bay, his personal assistant for three decades. Her office is next to his on the second floor of the main house. He typically uses the office two or three times a week. (A lot of people think Lucas lives at Skywalker, but he never has; his home is in San Anselmo, about 10 miles away.) I climb the steps to find Bay, a woman with a steady gaze, precise diction and a bear-trap memory for dates and names. She tells me that Coppola’s Zoetrope inspired Lucas to think of filmmaking as something entrepreneurial and personal. “Francis was the don of the Bay Area independent film community,” Bay says. Lucas wanted to create a similar hub with a collegial nature and a healthy distance from the poisoning agents and politics of Los Angeles. Lucasfilm was headquartered first in a converted Victorian house in San Anselmo, but then, in 1977, a space opera changed the scale of his ambitions.
Let’s just say I’d be a much happier employee if I had a huge office, a massive paycheck, and a seemingly-cool boss who was only around once or twice a week. Getting to meet Harrison Ford wouldn’t be that bad, either.
Today several people on my team got a memo from our supervisor about the proper procedure to follow when putting together a project report. It was really boring, until I got to this part:
- Check for correct spelling and grammer
-Submitted by “Still Laughing,” Virginia
We’ve all called in sick to work. The less principled among us have lied about the death of a family member. But the best way to get out of working is to lie small, not lie big. Lie about stuff like migraines and sick pets…stuff that’s hard to prove and won’t last long, so you’re less likely to get busted. Here’s an example of what you shouldn’t do: lie about having cancer. Cancer lasts a long time, and if you’re not going to regular treatments or having your hair fall out or whatever else, you are going to get busted on your awful, evil lie pretty soon. Hear that, Sandra Martinez of Mountlake Terrace, Washington? Let me repeat: do not lie about having cancer to get out of work.
I had just started as an assistant at a company right after I graduated college. I was the youngest person there and the only one doing admin work except the receptionist, so I was busy. I didn’t mind doing all the admin stuff, but I really minded it when I heard one of the execs say “Oh, maybe we can ask the intern to do it.” Pretty soon I realized they meant me. No offense to interns, but the whole point of finishing college was so I didn’t have to be an intern! I mean, they were paying me a salary and I had health insurance! How could anybody get “intern” and “assistant” mixed up? No matter WHAT I did everybody thought I was an intern, and even though I tried to correct people I didn’t want to look like a jerk. They gave me nothing to do except admin work and I finally quit to be an assistant somewhere else where people at least knew who I was and what I was hired to do.
–Submitted by Claire, Boston
Every office has factions. It may be divided up by department, age, or just plain old cliques. The office where I used to work was basically “bosses” vs. “assistants,” and we all hung out together. My current office is more divided into “20-somethings who go to happy hour after work” and “30-somethings who don’t.” However, the Gallup Management Journal claims that there are five office tribes at every company, and the trick is figuring out which one you (and your boss) are in.
- Stage One: These tribes are distinguished by hostility and despair. Their members say things like “Life sucks.”
- Stage Two: These tribes are characterized by apathy and a sense of futility. They don’t try, they don’t care, they don’t innovate, they don’t hold one another accountable for anything, and they revel in their disengagement. Their members say things like “My life sucks.”
- Stage Three: Tribal members are selfish at this stage. They are in it for themselves, and they are extremely averse to collaboration. Their attitude is “I’m great . . . and you’re not.”
- Stage Four: Tribe members have a sense of shared values; they willingly share knowledge and collaborate. Stage-four tribes are extremely competitive, but their competitive focus shifts to other tribes or companies. These tribes believe that “We’re great . . . and they’re not.”
- Stage Five: Tribes that attain this rare level are characterized by a sense of “innocent wonderment.” They apply themselves to the creation of things no one has dreamed of and are frequently incredibly successful. These tribes say that “Life is great.”
See more in-depth analysis here.
Recently fired Star Editor in Chief Bonnie Fuller is not going to have many coworkers crying when they see her walk away. An insider had some BF horror stories to tell Gawker:
Having a clothing allowance: Normal. Not being able to find the right bra for an event, even after having your fashion editor call in numerous freebies, driving her to hand over the still-warm bra off her back: Not normal. (Fuller denies this, claiming, “I’m not a big clothes sharer.”) Asking an editorial assistant to do a certain number of personal errands, like picking up the dry cleaning or wrapping presents: Normal. Purportedly asking assistant to wash out your breast pump: Not normal! (Fuller does not recall asking anyone to do this. “Could one of my assistants, being thoughtful, have done it? I don’t know. I’m oblivious.”)
Bonnie was such a bad boss, there’s an entire website devoted to hating her. If the anonymous source who started the site ever wants to tell more horror stories, we happen to know a blog that might be interested.
[Side note: Bonnie, the correct answer to the question posed on the cover of your magazine, “Did Tom leave Penelope for Nicole?” is “No.”]
Sometimes an assistant is not always an assistant. They may disguise the job behind a pretty title, but the taskload should be a surefire assistant indicator. Take a young woman named Karena, for example. She’s the wardrobe mistress for Martha Stewart’s TV show. Nowhere in her job title do you see the word “assistant.” However, Karena is assigned the duty of repainting the famously red soles of Martha’s Christian Louboutin shoes. But she doesn’t even get paint–she does it by hand with a Sharpie! And poses for a photo on Martha’s blog!
If Martha makes you repaint the bottoms of her shoes, and does not know your last name, you might as well be an assistant. Poor Karena.
It’s not uncommon for college students or recent grads to intern at magazines–Lauren Conrad, anyone?–but more and more high schoolers have tried to get in on the intern game. Having internships is a big boost on college applications, but some businesses get picky about who they want as free labor. Take Teen Vogue magazine, for example. After some problems with teenage interns tagging along uninvited to fashion industry parties, getting drunk, and making idiots of themselves, the magazine has now unceremoniously banned high school student interns.
Sorry about the ban, guys. Maybe you can work at the Gap instead? That’s almost the same thing as interning at a fashion magazine, right?
May is National Bike to Work Month, and this week is Bike to Work Week. Why should you bike to work? Well, considering the ever-rising price of gas, biking to work will definitely save you some cash. It’s also a nice way to get some exercise to counteract the fact that you sit at a desk all day, enjoy some nice spring weather, and also do your part to cut down on fuel emissions that contribute to global warming. Everybody wins.
Another alternative: carpool with a friend in the morning and bring your bike with you, then bike home that night. If you have kind of a long commute and don’t want to wear yourself out, riding one way might be a better idea.
Several towns, including NYC, Indianapolis, and Spokane, are organizing group rides throughout the month. Check your local paper or The League of American Bicyclists for more info.